The first thing that came to mind when a friend shared her Halloween experience with me was kids sports. The worst part of kids sports are the parents. But this was scary – pun intended.
Being a single parent is challenging enough, especially when you’re a minority. I guess you can never let your guard down even when trick or treating since there is no holiday when it comes to ignorance and racism.
These are her words:
“My son came from a Catholic school that was predominately Cape Verdean, Hispanic and black located right here in Boston. I decided to move out of the city because the violence was getting out of control and I couldn’t see myself raising my son in such a community.
I then did a little research and chose to move to a town (south of Boston) which is not very diverse at all. In fact 97% of students are white in his school. It took him almost a whole school year to adjust and fit in.
It would always break my heart to hear that during recess he was always playing alone. He sat alone during lunch as well. Kids were a little cruel and when he started fitting in, they always made remarks like, “you’re just trying to be cool” which of course didn’t help things. I felt a little discrimination from his teacher as well but maybe it was just my insecurities. He struggled a little bit but now he’s adjusting just fine.
I remember last year during Halloween we went trick or treating by his school. I had my cousin and her kids join us. Well I will never forget the way we were treated. I was quite surprised. As we were going door to door, a few people actually asked us if we were from around there. Another household made a comment, “they’re probably taking advantage.” My cousin overheard that. Needless to say I was a little turned off and embarrassed by that whole experience. I can laugh about it now. But hopefully this year we will have a better one. “
So I have this simple request to my white counterparts across the globe. When your doorbell rings this upcoming Halloween and you see a little Hispanic, Asian or African American brother or sister standing in front of you, feel free to drop an extra package of M & M’s in their bag, make them feel welcome and say hi to mom or dad.
live in a subdivision. They're very common in GA, but there are also some local rural areas. In my neighborhood, we go trick-or-treating on the golf cart. I think my kids are too old, but I'm not sure they agree.
ReplyDeleteThis year, I've invited 3 of my friends with younger kids to bring them here. If they all come, we will have 3 different racial groups represented, all with white moms.
I know, like in years past, my neighbors will comment on the cute costumes and generously give candy without asking the kids if they live in the s/d. We don't care if they live 5 miles away on a farm. They're kids and they deserve to have fun, too.
Anyone who doesn't recognize that should leave their lights off.
Bob, thanks for the reminder and keep the stories coming. Happy Halloween.
Lisa - thanks for your story. I feel so embarrassed but dont think I ever saw your reply before. Nevertheless it's never too late to respond even 8 years later. Most people are decent, I truly believe that, but too many are not. Hopefully this Halloween you'll think of this and smile, I know I will.
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