Lovell Dyett: I loved him madly and miss him deeply!

Bob Sansone, Lovell Dyett & Karen Buscemi (his producer at WBZ) - Breakfast at Brother's Deli St. Patrick's Day 2012

REMEMBERING LOVELL:

A CELEBRATION OF THE LIFE OF LOVELL DYETT

Saturday, February 23, 2013

Roxbury Community College

1234 Columbus Av., Roxbury, MA 02119

Program: RCC Media Arts Center (Bldg #1- Main stage) – 1:00 to 3:00PM

Reception: Student Center Café (Bldg #4 -201) – 3:00 to 4:00PM

FREE & OPEN TO THE PUBLIC

Donations are now welcome:

Remembering Lovell: A Celebration of the Life of Lovell Dyett

Please make checks payable to:

Remembering Lovell
C/o The Joyce A. & James R. Reed Charitable Trust, Inc.
(Tax ID): 273288842

Mailing Address:

Jose A. Alicea
Roxbury Community College
Room 3-455
1234 Columbus Avenue
Roxbury, MA 02120

Please visit the Remembering Lovell Dyett Facebook page

On the surface we didn’t have very much in common.  He was a Civil Rights Leader and Emmy Award winning tv and radio pioneer and legend who was black.  I was someone who had a career in the insurance industry who was white.

However, friendship and love transcend race, ethnicity or any other “difference” that too often sadly divides us.  One thing we certainly did share was our passion for diversity, inclusion and civil rights.

He was very close with Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. and I twice filed legislation on the importance of race relations, diversity and tolerance.  This common denominator led to an absolutely amazing friendship.

Like thousands of others over the years, I called into the “Lovell Dyett Show” on WBZ Radio 1030.  It was late one Saturday night in the summer of 2006.  As a matter of fact I was the last caller of the evening as his show ran from 9:00 pm to midnight.

I shared with him and his audience what was probably the most powerful experience of my life.  In late June 2005 while vacationing at the Fort Lauderdale Sheraton, my family found ourselves poolside (approximately 75 people) as the only white family in the middle of a wonderful African American family reunion.  For the first time in my daughter’s lives (Rachel- 8 & Hannah - 5) they experienced what it was like to be a minority.

Since Civil Rights and Diversity were so important to Lovell, he was captivated by this story.  His show was about to end so he asked me to stay on the line and give my information to his producer Karen Buscemi.   She asked me to keep them in the loop and maybe Lovell would have me on the show down the road.

Well sure enough, less than one year later he invited me into the WBZ studios to appear on his show.  In April 2007, I appeared in studio on the Lovell Dyett Show between 9:00 pm and 10:00 pm discussing my pending legislation across the table from the legend himself.   He peppered me with questions as only he could and we discussed the incredible events that took place at the hotel in Florida two years earlier and more importantly about the absolute necessity of addressing race relations in this country.

It was pretty surreal to be on his show, but for him I was just one of the many guests he had over the years.  Once 10:00 arrived, it was on to the next guest and I was on my way home.

Fast forward almost four and a half years, I learn that Lovell was ill and hospitalized, so I decided to pay him a visit.  That visit changed both of our lives.  It was the week before Labor Day 2011 and I showed up unannounced in his hospital room after work.  I re-introduced myself and told him that I wanted to see how he was doing and discuss my passion for diversity.

I think I caught him off guard and I don’t think he was feeling well that particular day so he asked if I could come back another time.  He asked me to call over the weekend and re-schedule a visit.   So that’s what I did.  I could sense he was feeling me out.  Why did I just appear out of the blue?

We had a nice conversation and he asked me to come by tomorrow afternoon (Labor Day).  Since he was hospitalized I asked if I could bring him anything.  Did he have any cravings for any type of food?  He said he would like a peach pie.  So it was off to Whole Foods in search of peach pie.   I also brought along some ice cream.  What is pie without ice cream?

He was in a community room watching the Red Sox game with two other patients.   He introduced me and said we could talk in a room down the hall.  He was in a wheelchair and he asked me to wheel him to the room.  As we proceeded down the hall he asked the following, “do you want a lecture or a conversation”?  I chuckled and responded, “I would like both”.

The lecture/conversation lasted three hours!  It was like I was visiting with a real life history book.  I was in awe.  Several times during my visit, nurses would check in and make sure everything was ok.  He told me about how he grew up on the campus of Bethune Cookman College in Florida.  His father was the school’s minister.  But he clearly was a “momma’s boy”.  He absolutely adored his mother.  Whenever he spoke about her, his eyes and face lit up.

I asked him about his relationship with Dr. Martin Luther King.  He immediately said Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.!  He said initially he was one of his “boys”, but quickly MLK Jr. realized his level of intelligence and he became a close friend and valuable member of his inner circle.

Even though it was really only the second time we met, you could sense a strong connection.  You can’t spend three hours hanging out with someone, enjoying great conversation unless something is there.  So as it was time to leave, I told him how much I enjoyed our “conversation” and how grateful I was that he spent so much time with me.  He told me that he had only given me part of one of his lectures and that I had to come back tomorrow.  I said “are you serious?  Would you be up for it?”  He said he was, and said I would.

So the following night I was back at the hospital for another “three hour visit”!  He laughed and told me that the nurses were talking about us after I left yesterday.  I jokingly said they were probably wondering who this white guy was and what did he want.

From that day to the time of his death on Memorial Day 2012, there wasn’t a week that went by that I didn’t make at least one visit to see him.  Usually it ended up being multiple visits.  And the visits with Lovell were never short ones.  Some lasted as long as six hours and almost everyone included the mandatory cup of Dunkin Donuts coffee.  The man loved his coffee.  He also loved fried rice.  I would tease him and tell him I may need to get a second job to afford these visits.

On two occasions, we received a day pass and went out for the day.  The first time we had lunch in Central Square in Cambridge and the second time we met his former producer Karen Buscemi and her family at Brother’s Deli in Wakefield for breakfast on St. Patrick’s Day.  He really enjoyed that afternoon.

For me, our relationship went from fascination, to friendship, to love.  He was the most amazing person I ever met.  He loved to engage people in conversation.

The stories that he shared were amazing.  Whether it was meeting with MLK Jr. when he came to Boston, to Jackie Robinson visiting at his house in Florida.  The man knew everyone.  He told me about how he twice interviewed Bill Clinton – once in the White House.

He met Oprah, J-Lo & Dr. Wayne Dyer to name a few.  I was curious as to who was the person that he met that he wanted to meet the most.  It was the one and only Duke Ellington.  That explained his signature sign off from his show, “I love you, I love you madly”.

One of the people he admired and loved the most was Tom Atkins, who became the first African American elected to the Boston City Council in 1967.  He was also the first African American student body president in the Big Ten (Indiana), and a Harvard Law School Graduate.  He really had a special place in his heart for Tom.

He told me about the time the two of them were in the south, I believe it was in Georgia, and they were hiding in a ditch on the side of the road avoiding gunshots from Klansmen. 

 

He reminisced about the good times he had with Tom Atkins and former Boston Celtic legend Bill Russell, someone I deeply respect and admire.

He was extremely religious and always kept a Bible bedside.  He would often tell me how he counseled people in the hospital earlier in the day and how he loved a good sermon.  Religion and education were staples in his life.  He was incredibly proud that his daughter Lydia graduated from Harvard.

As time passed it became clear that Lovell was nearing the end of his life.  It was something that I denied for awhile but reluctantly had to accept.

While our friendship lasted only eight months, it was something that we both cherished.  I was truly blessed to have Lovell in my life and I will always be grateful for the time we spent together.  

From time to time I listen to a voicemail he left just to hear his amazing voice.  I know he is in a better place and I know he is talking to someone.  Rest in peace my friend.  I love you madly and miss you deeply.